Mourning Doves
by BetaRayThorse
Summary: Kuwabara says the Mazoku are like wolves, fierce and wild. Yusuke's says they're more like Mourning Doves. Just like the Mazoku, when a Mourning Dove's mate dies, it follows soon after. Takes place after the end of the series. Yaoi. Kuwabara/Yusuke. Reviews are adored.
1. Returning

AN: Takes places after the last episode and is very slightly au as it contradicts canon a tiny bit. This story also plays with the idea of various sexual and romantic identities. Also, as a warning to avoid upsetting people at the risk of a spoiler, this story does contain character death.

* * *

They kissed.

The first thing that happened to him as he returned to Earth was being kissed by Keiko. It was strange. Yusuke found none of the hundreds of things he had heard about love on Keiko in the contact. It felt like nothing more than a kiss on the hand, flesh brushing against flesh. His heart didn't race, and he didn't feel like electricity was running through his body.

How strange, he thought to himself. He had waited months for this, and there was... nothing. There was even a small part of him that told him, _Stop. This is wrong. You don't want this._ What he once felt for Keiko was gone.

Yusuke figured that this was one of the things you had to grow to love as an adult, like how sex was supposed to hurt the first time. So he pushed the disturbance down, though he did move his head to break the kiss before Keiko showed any intent of doing so.

"Woah, easy tiger," Yusuke teased. "We'll have all the time in the world to kiss in places where we won't get sand up our asses."

Keiko laughed and sat up. Her weight rested on Yusuke's waist, and she had a leg on each side of him. Her palms rested on the fighter's chest.

"Really, Yusuke. You used to pull up my skirt while we were in middle school, and now you don't want me to kiss you? Are you even the same Yusuke that I knew?"

Yusuke held up his hands, like he was defending himself. "Come on! I'm the same good ol' Yusuke, just wiser and more mature now. Spending time in Demon World will do that to you."

Though he might not want to currently kiss her, that didn't mean he no longer cared for her. She would always be a dear friend to him.

"Then maybe all men should spend some time there," Keiko joked. She stood up and held out her hand. "Let's go up. I'm sure everyone wants to talk to you."

"You took the words right out of my mouth!" Yusuke said before taking her hand and hopping up.

Keiko held his hand as they walked up the shore. The contact felt uncomfortable for Yusuke, like a untruthful promise. But he didn't give it too much thought. He was probably just too used to having contact with demons.

The people on the beach met them halfway, and when they were standing right across from each other, it was then that Yusuke felt the beating of his heart that he had been expecting.

Kuwabara was beautiful.

Yusuke couldn't stop himself from looking hm over. He was wearing a blue jacket with a lighter blue t-shirt underneath, and though Kuwabara wasn't as fit as he had been before Yusuke left, he could still see the well defined muscles hiding under his shirt, and they were _beautiful._ His eyes still held compassion in them. This was still the same man who gained strength from love, adored kittens, and tore down the barrier between worlds because he cared about him.

Yusuke wondered why it was only now that he was thinking of Kuwabara this way. Maybe he had just mature or it had to do with the ages they spent apart.

When the demon realized the human was staring back, a faint blush crossed both of their faces. It seemed he wasn't alone in being surprised by the changes in each other. Kuwabara shook his head, like trying to break out of a trance. He then grabbed onto Yusuke's head and squeezed.

"Why ya staring at me, punk? Got something on my face?" Kuwabara asked.

And then things shifted back to normal.

Yusuke laughed and punched Kuwabara's cheek. "Yeah, you idiot! My fist!"

Yukina gasped, Shizuru rolled her eyes, and Botan commented that boys would be boys. Kurama agreed.

* * *

Weeks had passed, but the idea of being with Keiko hadn't grown any more appealing. He enjoyed being around her, sure, but whenever their lips touched he wanted to cross the room.

The idea of it tore him up. He looked over at the sleeping form next to him and was filled with guilt. She slept peacefully with one arm wrapped around Yusuke's forearm. They had moved in together. Yusuke didn't want to move in with his mom, and Keiko had offered so he wouldn't have to find an apartment.

He watched the rise and fall of her chest. She was innocent and happily in love. She finally had the life she had dreamed of before Yusuke died for the first time.

It was a life he couldn't give her. It was a life she deserved, and he was going to snatch it away from her. He liked Keiko as a friend, a lot, but he couldn't love her like a husband.

Yusuke carefully left the bed. If he couldn't sleep, there no point staying in bed hating his life. He grabbed his coat resting on the floor.

"Yusuke...?"

The man turned around. Keiko had woken up when he left the bed. Yusuke balled his hands into a fist like he often did now. He knew he shouldn't be angry at Keiko, none of this was her fault, but his emotions didn't seem to care. He turned back around.

"I've got the shits. Gonna go get some medicine," he lied.

He was out the door before she could say anything.

* * *

The closest drug store was several miles away. Yusuke walked the entire way. It gave him time to think.

By the time he arrived, he had found no solution to his problem with Keiko and the sun had come up. That only put him in a worse moods since now Keiko would be worried sick about him.

"And I can't even blow off any damn steam without causing some serious harm..." he said to himself.

"Urameshi? What are you doing here?" a familiar voice asked.

The door of the drugstore slide open to reveal Kazuma Kuwabara. He had a bag in his hand.

Yusuke found a bit of his anger melting away. "Had to get away from some stuff, so I took a walk. Rather not talk about." Because although he wanted to ask for advice, he didn't want to confess to what he considered his fault to Kuwabara. He was his good friend, but he wasn't too smart when it came to relationships. The guy was an adult and still hadn't had a boyfriend of girlfriend.

"Alright. I understand." He walked out of the doorway, and the automatic doors closed behind him. "Wait, walk?! You live miles away from him!"

The demon shrugged. "So I went for a long walk, big deal. What are _you_ doing here? It's a bit strange for a guy to be in a drugstore at sunrise, don't you think so?"

Kuwabara blushed slightly. "My sister needed me to get something for me. Anyway, let me give you a ride home. Keiko must be worried sick."

Yusuke didn't argue. Guilt now pooled in his stomach. Dammit! He had done something wrong again! He balled up his fists and took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. A warm hand was placed on his shoulder.

"You now you can always talk to me, right Yusuke? I'm here for you." Kuwabara said.

Yusuke found himself calming. The offer seemed to take a great weight off his chest. He could spill his soul to friend, confess his troubles, and the smaller man would then know just what he could do that would make everyone happy. His heart jumped in his chest. Kuwabara's hand sent electricity through his body.

Dammit. Yusuke might not know how to treat other people, but he knew himself. He was in love with Kuwabara. Wonderful. Life just grew all the more difficult, and he found himself wanting to return to Demon World. It was looking simple in comparison to this. His rage came back.

"Thanks for the offer, but I'll pass."

Before Kuwabara pulled away, he searched his eyes for any hint at what his was feeling. Hopefully, he would find some mutual affection. There was concern there, also sadness, and was that anger...?

Apparently so, because Yusuke was hit in the back of his head afterward.

"You asshole! What was that for!?" Yusuke shouted.

"You were acting all sentimental like a girl! I had to do something! Now get in the car. I need to get back before Shizuru's pms gets me killed."

* * *

The ride back to Keiko and Urameshi's house was a quiet one. The shorter man seemed more content to look out than window than actually talk to Kuwabara.

It was strange for Kuwabara to think about just how much Urameshi had changed. The passing years had done a wonder for his physique and apparently his relationship to his friends as well. The fighter kept staring at him. Even now, he could catch Urameshi glancing at him occasionally.

Of course, it didn't really help that Kuwabara stared back, but he had his reason to. He had to make sure Urameshi still looked like he was in good health and could still punch a full grown man through a wall.

He sighed. Being around Urameshi made him want to get back into fighting, which could lead to disastrous results if he followed through on his impulse. He could get kicked out of school or even his home. Then the future he had worked so hard for would be ruined.

The silence grew unbearable as they drove through the city. Kuwabara had to speak up.

"So, do you want to hear about this girl in class? Rumor is, she's-"

"I'm not in the mood," Urameshi interrupted in a small and uncaring voice. He was still staring out he window. The man's attitude had dropped since they met at the store.

_Of course he isn't_, Kuwabara thought. Thinking a different topic might help, he spoke again. "What's Demon World like? I bet living with those demons was like living with animals."

That got Urameshi to smile slightly. Kuwabara took it is a success.

"You could say that," the demon explained. "Chu howls like a dog when he gets drunk enough. Jin soars in the sky like an eagle during the spring."

"And what about the Mazoku? I bet they're like wolves."

Urameshi's smile faded once more. Kuwabara silently scolded himself for even asking.

"No. We're like Mourning Doves." His voice was sad and heavy with emotion. "Do you know that when a Mourning Dove's mate dies, it dies do?"

Kuwabara adjusted the air conditioner in the car. "No. Can't say I did."

"Mazoku are the same way. If my lover dies or leaves me, I'll die of a broken heart." Urameshi moved from looking out the window to reclining in his chair.

"Sounds rough."

This was news to Kuwabara. He couldn't imagine what it was like for Urameshi. His life would literally be in his partner's hands. When she died, Urameshi's life would end as well. What a horrible burden.

"Eh. What can you do? When life gives you lemons, you can over roll with it or waste your time crying." There was a brief silent moment. Kuwabara didn't really know how to respond after hearing such news, and Urameshi didn't seem to want to talk. "My house is the first right."

He pulled into the driveway. Urameshi thanked Kuwabara before getting out of the car. Keiko came running out of the front door and wrapped her arms tightly around Urameshi, which made the man's previously stressed facial expression soften.

"Yusuke! I was worried about you! I thought someone might have kidnapped you or something! If you were going to be out all night, you should have called me!"

Urameshi gently hugged her back. "Hey, have some more faith in me. There isn't a power on Earth that could harm me." Earth being the keyword.

Keiko stepped back from Urameshi. She looked over his shoulder, and Kuwabara waved when he thought she saw him. "Oh, hello there. Thank you for bringing Yusuke back."

He saw Urameshi tense as Keiko reached for his hand. "You're welcome. Hey, Urameshi, we need to hang out sometime soon, just like odd times."

Urameshi turned to face Kuwabara. "I'd like that."

With that, Kuwabara drove off. On the way home, he stopped by the pet store and bought two Mourning Doves, a boy and a girl.


	2. Breaking Up

Rating has gone up because of talk of sexual acts.

* * *

"Grandma, I need to ask you something."

The man sat in his ex-master's room. Pu was resting his large head in Yusuke's lap while the demon casually stroked his hair. Genkai put down the tea she had been drinking down and sighed.

"I thought I was done being a mentor years ago. I suppose this is my price for having 364 days of peace, one messy one."

Yusuke's face retained its serious expression. "This is important to me, and if I didn't feel like I'd knock down a mountain if something didn't change, I wouldn't ask you. It's about Keiko."

The elderly woman raised an eyebrow. "Is it? Oh boy." Her words were filled with sarcasm. "The drama of youth and romance."

"Don't make fun of me!" Yusuke barked. Pu raised his head slightly in confusion, and the once Spirit Detective affectionately squeezed the loose fur on his neck. "Sorry Pu."

"So it _is_ serious, huh?" Genkai asked, the previously used teasing tone now gone.

"Yeah." Yusuke nodded. "I..." He closed his mouth. the words had died before they came out on his tongue. It was so hard to put how he felt into accurate terms. He hadn't told anyone about his struggle yet, and the conflict had only grown worse. "I don't love Keiko anymore."

And suddenly, his problem felt smaller.

"Is that all? You had me worried for a moment, you dumbass," Genkai said.

"I don't think you understand,." He looked down at Pu as he spoke. His voice was small and gentle. "She's spent years waiting for me. She was what kept me going while I was in Demon World. I dreamed of making her my mate."

Yusuke doubted Genkai understood what he meant by the word mate, but he had grown so accustomed to the term that he didn't think of explaining it. To him, his mate would be the one person he gave his heart to, who he would die along with.

"And now... I can't stand it!" He squeezed his legs with his hands in an attempt to stop the tears threatening to form. It didn't work. A few tears rolled down his cheek. "I love her, but _not like that!_ And I don't want to hurt her by telling her this! She deserves more than this! She deserves the life she wants, a life with me that I can't give to her!"

Genkai waited for him to recompose himself before answering. "Yusuke, Keiko's not a child. She can handle herself. If you don't love her anymore, you need to tell her."

"I know. I know." It wasn't the answer Yusuke wanted to hear, but he knew it was the best option. "It's just, I wish there was another way."

"Don't we all," Genkai commented. "It would be wonderful if we could stay in love with our childhood sweethearts. Sadly, life's a bitch."

Pu nuzzled Yusuke as if to give him comfort.

It was settled. He was going to have to break things off with Keiko. There was no way around it. Today was yet another night where he was not looking forward to going home.

* * *

Yusuke didn't return home until dawn. When he finally did enter the home he shared with Keiko, he found his roommate standing in the doorway getting ready to leave for some weekend meet up. She had her casual clothes on, and there was a purse hanging from her shoulder. She no longer greeted Yusuke with a smile like she once did. Instead, she simply nodded in his direction.

"Yusuke, there's something-"

"Keiko, I-"

They spoke at the same time.

"You go first," Keiko suggested.

"Right." Yusuke rubbed his neck and found his mouth going dry. He had stood his ground against some of the strongest creatures in existence. He could punch through a building. He had died twice and lived to tell about it. He could break up with someone. "It's not your fault or anything, but I feel like we should go back to being friends. I just don't feel what I once did. I know I'm an ass for this, so if you want to hit me, go ahead!"

He closed his eyes, bracing himself for the impact. Instead, he heard laughter. He opened one eye and saw that Keiko was giggling.

"Funny. I was about to say the same thing."

It took Yusuke a few moments to recover from shock, but then he was laughing right along side her. He felt wonderful. He felt the happiest he had been since he came back to Earth.

"You haven't been the same. The Yusuke I love definitely wouldn't have spent half the time that we were together pouting," Keiko said, still giggling.

"Hey! I had my reasons!" Yusuke laughed again.

"Mh-hm. I'm sure. I bet you also had a reason for taking weeks to tell me you didn't like me that way anymore, right?"

"Well... I-" The ex-Spirit Detective was at a loss of words and more than slightly embarrassed. "I... didn't want to upset you. That's all."

Keiko walked past him and opened the door. She held her fingers out like she was getting ready to shoot a gun, and she was still smiling. "You know, being honest is better than lying, and you're lucky I'm such a forgiving person." She pantomimed shooting a gun. "Now, see ya."

She exited the house, and Yusuke was left thinking how that was better than any outcome he had imagined.

* * *

"My my my, you seem like you are in a better mood today."

Yusuke laughed and scratched the back of his neck. "Gee, is it that obvious, Kurama?"

The demon nodded. "When everyone's favorite ex-Spirit Detective starts getting quiet, violet, and pouts all the time, people tend to know. Now, would you like some bread?"

Kurama held out a stick of bread, which Yusuke happily took. They had agreed to meet at a restaurant for lunch after the red head called him last night. Yusuke was more than happy to go anywhere when the words "free food" were mentioned. They were sitting at a booth with a table in-between them.

"Thanks." Yusuke took a large bite of bread.

"You're more than welcome. So what ended up happening with you and Keiko?"

Yusuke pondered for a moment if he would answer or not before speaking. "We broke up. She's seeing another guy, well guys to be more accurate, and I'm..." _Dreaming about Kuwabara and trying to figure out what to do with these feelings,_ "just, you know. Enjoying being back in the Living World, trying to find a job, spray painting butts on teachers' homes, all that jazz. Speaking of which, know anywhere that's hiring?"

"No, but I'll keep my ears open," Kurama replied.

The food came, causing Yusuke to cheer happily. His portion of food dwarfed Kurama's order, and the former wasted no time digging into his food. His love for food had survived to adulthood. Before the fox even touched his food, he was speaking again.

"Yusuke, were you actually planning on making Keiko your mate? She's a fine girl and I think highly of her, but you two have very different life spans." Kurama said flatly.

Yusuke swallowed his mouthful of food. He leaned back and let his legs rest against the bottom part of Kurama's booth. "Of course. Life's not worth living if you take the routes that'll let you live longer instead of the ones you'll enjoy."

"Perhaps, but love, unbonded and human love at least, is fleeting. Had you stayed in demon world a few more years, you might have found someone with a similar sexuality and life span as yours. Now that you've ended things with Keiko, you should return and..." Yusuke grinned sheepishly. "Don't tell me; you've already fallen for someone else?"

Yusuke chuckled. "Guilty as charged! What can I say; the heart ones what the hearts wants."

And the heart wanted a muscular man whose determination knew no bounds.

"I should have known." Kurama sighed. "Who is it this time?"

"Kuwabara," Yusuke said, blushing slightly.

The brawler expected Kurama to be shocked, but instead he heard the fox laugh. It was a nice relief. "Is that so? I should have known. I always thought there could have been something between you two."

"Eh- What?" Yusuke blinked, surprised. "Is it that obvious? And here I was, thinking my feelings came out of nowhere."

With a smile still on his lips, Kurama shook his head. "No, Hiei and I used to joke about. You two always got so worked up about each other." Yusuke laughed, and before he could speak, Kurama spoke again in a more serious tone. "But I insist once again you listen to my advice Yusuke. Come to demon world, find a mate with a similar lifespan, and bound before this crush of your goes any further."

"Kurama." Yusuke waved his fork. "Didn't you hear me the first time? I'm not going to ignore how I feel because it could make me die earlier. It's no worth it. Besides, how do we even know I'm like my dad? I don't need to eat humans to live, so why can't I have a different sexuality as well? Maybe I take after my human side here."

"Then let me ask you a question: have you been able to orgasm since you came back to life?"

Yusuke almost choked on the food. He leaned forward and gently slapped the table. "What the hell kind of question is that?!"

Kurama was backing to smiling. "Mazoku can't ejaculate unbonded except in the body of their future mate."

Yusuke huffed. "Coincidence."

"I'm sure it is. Now, do you have something else you want to ask me? I feel like there's been a question in the back of your mind since we arrived," Kurama said.

"Yeah, actually." Yusuke clapped his hands together. "Could I move in with you?"

"Yusuke..."

"Don't give me that! As much as I care for Keiko, because she's awesome, really, she keeps having guys over all night, and it's driving me crazy."

He frowned with disgust. Keiko had gotten into a habit of inviting strangers into her bedroom. It was experimenting, she would say. It was enough to drive Yusuke mad to know that they had no plans to be together, yet there were just a room away, making love.

"Oh?" There was a spark of curiosity in Kurama's voice. "Yusuke, there is nothing wrong with having any amount of sex with anyone as long as it's consensual."

Great. He was being lectured. Yusuke leaned back in his booth and crossed his arms.

"I know that, but still...! It just makes me skin crawl knowing she's screwing guys just to screw 'em! Sex isn't suppose to be that. It's suppose to be something more intimate, a way to bound you to another per-" Kurama started laughing. "What's so funny?"

"Oh, it's nothing, just that that's exactly what your dad would have said. You really are like the other Mazoku."

* * *

Kuwabara laid down on his couch in the living room. In his hand was a large book he was supposed to be reading for school. Shizuru was also in the living room, smoking a cigarette and watching television.

"So, Little Brother, Valentine's Day is tomorrow. Thinking about spending it with anyone special?"

Kuwabara shrugged. He attempted to read while he talked with his sister. "A bunch of girls will give me chocolate like always, which will be a pain to return. I might spend it with Yukina, though I doubt she really understand Valentine's Day." He highlighted a passage.

Shizuru blew on her cigarette, filling the room with smoke. Kuwabara had grown up around cigarettes, so to him it was a familiar smell of home. He briefly wondered about Yusuke. Word had gotten to him about his break up with Keiko. Would he be spending the day with a girl?

"Though I could always teach her about it." He closed his book and scooted to the other edge of the couch where a large bird cage sat on a small table. Inside were two doves. Kuwabara opened the cage and took the male whom he named Nageki out. The bird perched happily on his hand. The female, Lemon, flew to his shoulder.

"Yukina Yukina Yukina. That's all you've talked about since Yusuke came back," Shizuru said. If she was hinting at something, Kuwabara didn't know what it was. "There you go again, chasing after girls you have no chance with to avoid being yourself."

Kuwabara huffed. "I don't know what you're saying, but I'm pretty sure I don't like it." He began to stroke Nageki's head with his thumb, and the bird cooed happily. Kuwabara smiled. What a cute little bird.

"Whatever. You'll figure it out eventually." Shizuru blew another cloud of smoke into the air.

"You don't know what you're talking about." Kuwabara sniffed the air. "And go smoke somewhere else. You'll give my birds cancer."

With a roll of her eyes, Shizuru left the room. It was at this time that Kuwabara heard the house phone go off. He sat Nageki on his shoulder opposite of Lemon and grabbed the phone.

"Hello?" Kuwabara asked after he picked up the call.

"Yo!" He smiled when he heard the voice. It only took him a fraction of a second to identify to speaker as being Yusuke Urameshi. "Kuwabara! You free next weekend? We need to hang out more."

There was a little flutter in his stomach. "You bet. Name the time and place, and I'll be there."


	3. A Day Out

Yusuke checked his watch yet again. Twenty after. Where was Kuwabara? The demon usually wasn't one to be impatient, but this wasn't a normal occurrence. Today was going to be spent with Kazuma Kuwabara.

"Urameshi!" a voice called out to him.

Yusuke looked up from his watch and smiled when he saw Kuwabara in front of him. The man wore a thick long sleeved jacket, appropriate attire for the current cold weather. Yusuke on the other hand, wore nothing more than a long sleeve shirt. Demon blood made him it take a lot colder temperature than what Japan ever got down to to effect him.

"There you are, you ass!" He playfully shoved the other. "You kept me waiting. Orphans need savin' or something?"

Kuwabara laughed and rubbed the back of his head. He was blushing slightly. "No, nothing like that. I was spending time with Yukina and got carried away."

Yusuke's smile faded. "Yeah, you two are a thing, right? How's that going?"

The taller man's blush deepened. They began to walk, and Kuwabara's gaze stay focused on the street ahead of him. He fixed his jacket into a more comfortable position. "Well, we're not really a thing. To be honest I don't really think Yukina knows what love is. She doesn't seem to get it when I talk to her about it. I mean, I would like for her to, but-"

The demon interrupted him. "Probably." He rubbed his chin, thinking. "If I recall correct, most Ice Apparitions were aro ace..." Kuwabara stared questioningly him. Yusuke placed his head on his shoulder. "Aromantic asexual. Just know it means you have very little chance with her."

"Hmph! The Kuwabara charm just hasn't had time to worth yet." He hunched his shoulders, making Yusuke move his hand. The smaller man's expression fell once more. "Speaking of romance, you're in a better mood. I'm taking things with Keiko...?"

"Ended. It feels like a great burden has been lifted off my chest." Up ahead was a familiar hot spring. Upon recognizing the location, Yusuke grabbed Kuwabara's hand and began to jog towards it. He made sure to stay slow enough for Kuwabara to follow. "Let's take a dip in the hot springs!"

"It's cold outside, Urameshi!"

"That's the best time for it, you idiot."

* * *

Kuwabara carefully dipped his foot into the water. It was hot, but not too hot. He was gently easing himself into the water while Urameshi daringly entered the water all at once. The shorter man sighed n satisfaction. Kuwabara rolled his eyes. Urameshi had greatly changed since before he left for Demon World, but somethings had stayed the same, like his bold personalty.

Others, did not. A part of Kuwabara wished they could go back to the days where the two of them had a rivalry unlike any other and they got to do great things together. As he glanced over at Urameshi, he tried hard not to look below the towel on his head, the longing for the past grew. Neither of them wore any clothing.

"Don't you think this is a little gay?" Kuwabara asked. "Two guys, alone, nude, hanging out..."

Urameshi actually looked a bit hopeful. Kuwabara didn't follow through with that line of thought.

"It _is_ a hot spring, so no." Urameshi leaned back and rested his arms on the cool ground. "What, do you want me to go put my clothes back on?"

Kuwabara shook his head. "No, just... never mind." He needed to get his mind out of the gutter.

A comfortable moment of silence followed before Kuwabara started up a conversation about the baseball games Urameshi had missed while he was away. The red head could have spent the entire day talking to him. They had much to catch up on, after all.

While he was in the middle of telling Urameshi about the time he sensed a home run and got to catch the ball, Urameshi closed his eyes, almost like he was falling asleep. Kuwabara waved his hand in front of his face.

"Urameshi? Do you need to get out now?"

With a smile on his face, the other shoved his hand away. "I'm fine, dumbass, just relaxing. I'm used to the waters of Demon World where you'll die if you're not careful."

At some point during the visit, Kuwabara has shifted from sitting across from Urameshi to sitting right next to him. The shorter man was blushing heavily, and he doubted it had to do with the hot water.

"Sounds horrible. I don't know why you spent so much time there," Kuwabara said.

Urameshi cupped his hands together and squirted water out from in-between them. "It's home," he explained happily. "I have friends there, sparring partners, history... You should see for yourself sometime."

Kuwabara didn't answer. "It's going to rain soon. We should be heading back."

Urameshi nodded and stood up. He stretched, moaning as he did so. "Good idea! I doubt you could have taken much more anyway," he teased.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," Urameshi placed his hand on top of the other's head, "that you can't deal with the heat. It's nothing to be ashamed of though. I mean, compared to a great and powerful fighter like myself, who could?"

Kuwabara knew the words were said to be playful instead of gloating, but his pride didn't seem to care. "Oh yeah?! I'll have you know that I'm the strongest guy in the world!" Probably.

Urameshi laughed and dunked his head under water. After flailing his arms around, he resurfaced. He came face to face with Urameshi's revealed chest. Shit. He was frozen. Urameshi had changed physically since he left all those years ago, and Kuwabara was couldn't help but observe the change. His more were more defined then they had ever been. There was a new scar on his left hip, and a couple of his old ones had faded. How interesting.

Urameshi interrupted his train of thought. "See something you like...?"

"As if, you asshole!" He grabbed Urameshi's arm and flipped him into the water

* * *

As they walked back to where they met, Yusuke had a hard time focusing on even the road in front of him.

Lust was flooding his mind. A part of him wondered if this was a demon thing, but maybe it was his own libido or the result of soaking in the hot water. It didn't matter. What did was that he couldn't stop thinking about Kuwabara and what he would like to do with him behind close doors. The intense desire was something new for him.

Kuwabara walked silently beside him. While they were in the hot springs, Yusuke had happily noticed that Kuwabara was interested in him. He had caught the man staring at him when Kuwabara thought he wasn't looking at him. There was also the fact the he had been concerned about his health and how he moved closer to him, like he enjoyed and wanted the extra contact.

Shit. Those thoughts weren't helping him anyway. He took a deep breath. Think unsexy thoughts, he told himself. A few drops of rain began to fall on the pavement of the sidewalk. It was only then that Kuwabara spoke up.

"The rain's coming sooner than I thought." He reached into his jacket's pocket and pulled out a small umbrella. "My sister better have closed the windows. She likes to leave them open for the birds to see outside, and she forgets to close them a lot."

"Birds?" Yusuke weakly questioned.

The other nodded. He scratched the side of his cheek as he spoke. "Uh, yeah. I got two mourning doves awhile ago. They're named Nageki and Lemon."

Yusuke found that oddly touching. The shorter man had a strong connection to that specie of birds.

Kuwabara opened he umbrella and pulled Yusuke under too, pulled him closer to him. Their sides were touching; Kuwabara had his arm around the other's shoulder.

Fuck. Yusuke wanted to kiss him. Being this close to him and just the way he cared for the taller man was too much. He began to fantasize. He knew what Kuwabara looked like under his clothes. He wanted to kiss those old scars, run his hands through his hair, praise his heart and body, caress, and-

"Urameshi!" Kuwabara's scream shook him out of his day dream.

Yusuke blinked. "Huh? What's wrong?"

Kuwabara took off his jacket, wrapped it around Yusuke, and pulled the hood over his head. "Your demon side is showing!"

Now Yusuke looked down. True enough, his purple markings had appeared on his skin, and though he couldn't see it, he was sure his hair had suddenly grown too.

Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit! This was not good!

"I, um, I've got to go!" Yusuke shouted before taking off running. "See ya later!"

"Urameshi! Wait!"

Kuwabara's cry was useless. Yusuke was several blocks down the road before he said the first syllable.


	4. Crush

AN: Sorry for the late update. This chapter is a bit one-sided in terms of romance and contains homophobia, but I promise the two _do_ get together. The diving of the flying demons in this chapter is inspired by the courtship dance of Bald Eagles. Also, updated first chapter's author note to include a warning.

* * *

"It was the strangest thing. Yesterday, Urameshi and I were just walking back from the hot springs when he shifted into his demon form out of nowhere! Maybe it's triggered by rain or something."

"Why is it that I'm always the one everyone goes to for demon problems?"

Kuwabara shrugged. "Hiei doesn't like to talk much, and both Botan and Koenma are hard to get a hold of." Asking Urameshi himself would just be awkward.

Not only had the shorter man seemed embarrassed by the change, but Kuwabara was having a hard time thinking of him without remembering his nude body. Kurama chuckled.

"True, true. Well, I am getting a free meal out of this, so I won't complain anymore. Bread sticks?" Kurama held out the basket.

"Yeah, thanks." Kuwabara took one and bit into it. When he looked back over at his companion, he noticed that Kurama was smiling at him. "What? Did I do somethin' funny?"

Kurama chuckled. "Not really. It's just that Yusuke took me out to eat not too long ago, and he suggested the very same place." Kuwabara almost choked on his bread. "I'm not too happy about your relationship, no offense intended, but I must say, you two are a good match."

He really wanted to punch Urameshi in the face right now. He deserved it for having the same taste of food as he did.

"Match?!" Kuwabara barked. "I think I know what you're implying, and I don't like it one damn bit."

"Mates. There's no need to deny it, Kuwabara. Now that it's happened, I won't say any bad words. I will be nothing but supportive."

"M-M-Mates?!" The words were loud enough to cause a couple of other dinners to turn and look at the pair.

Kurama placed his finger over his own lips. "Quiet down, Kuwabara. You're causing a scene. It's nothing to be embarrassed about. I know that it meant seem strange here, but really, it's perfectly natural-" Kurama's eyes widened. "Wait. You two didn't...?"

Kuwabara's stomach felt like it was in his throat. He wasn't sure how to deal with this new information. A part of him was still desperately hoping that Kurama was just using some demon slang like Yusuke had the earlier day and maybe mate just meant best friends for life. Yeah. That was it.

"We just hung out. That's all."

Kurama let his elbow rest on the table and rubbed his temples. "Wonderful. This is what you get for dropping your guard around your friends, Kurama. Too late to go back now. Might as well explain things fully..." He was speaking to himself. "Kuwabara, Yusuke changed into his demon form before we wanted to mate with you. Any other demon would have followed through with the process, but I guess Yusuke is more human than most demons."

No denying it now. Kuwabara felt his mouth go dry "Urameshi wanted to... He... My friend wants to screw me..." He had been hoping to find that the change to Urameshi's demon form had been brought about by the phase of the moon or the warmth of the water, not because he wanted to sleep with him. His knees felt weak. He wasn't sure if he could stand up without stumbling.

Kurama nodded. "Yes, and quite a lot for him to change like that."

A realization dawned upon Kuwabara, and he was flooded for concern with his friend. He slammed his hands on the table and leaned closed to Kurama.

"Wait, Yusuke's a Mourning Dove!" Kuwabara shouted. "I might've broke his heart! He's not going to die, is he?"

Because if that was true, Kuwabara would leave the restaurant right that moment to run where Urameshi was and kiss him. He wouldn't let his best friend die, even if he didn't love him.

"Is that how it explained things to you? By comparing himself to a bird? That's not even a good explanation." Kurama shook his head. "You two didn't sleep together, so no. It's only after Yusuke loses his virginity, what we call 'bonding' in Demon World for his kind, that his life would be tied to yours."

Kuwabara felt like a weight had been pulled off his chest. That was good. Unless he slept with Urameshi, they could try to carry on like they used to. Hopefully.

"Thank God. You demons sure are strange. No offense intended."

"None taken. Finding a lover as a demon is interesting."

Kuwabara found himself blushing. His best friend was in love with him. He wasn't sure what to do with that knowledge. "If you don't mind me asking, are you like a Mourning Dove too, Kurama?"

"The most common word for them is Lifebonder, and no." He sipped his water. "My sexuality is more like a typical human's. I'm monoamorous like Yusuke, but I don't bond like he does, and I will not die if my partner does. I'll be sad, but I can move on."

Kuwabara nodded. He reached into his wallet

and pulled out a handful of money. He placed it on the table before standing up.

"Hey, I'm going to go home. I need to time to think over some stuff, do some chores, feed my birds..."

"'I understand." He grabbed Kuwabara's arm as the human tried to leave. "Kuwabara, I suggest you let this crush pass. It would be better for Yusuke to take a mate with a lifespan similar to his own."

Kuwabara jerked his hand free and forced a smile. "Don't worry. I'm not even into guys." With that, he left.

He wasn't gay. Sure he had never kissed a girl, but he was just waiting for the perfect one, Yukina, to be ready for romance. That was all. The reason he couldn't stop thinking about Urameshi's body was because it had changed.

Yeah, that was it. He wasn't queer. He was normal

* * *

Yusuke was sure had the worst case of blue balls known to man.

He felt like he was about to go mad. It wasn't so much the pressure in his groin that was annoying him but the need to fuck anything, and there was nothing he could. He had tried unsuccessfully to jerk off around an hour. He had fled to Demon World yesterday in hopes of getting some advice on how to control his lust. He didn't want his markings to show again while he was with Kuwabara. Those damn things were still on his body. When he finally did act on his feelings, he wanted it to be his mind's decision not his cock's.

If he was going to be honest with himself, he also ran away to the other realm out of embarrassment.

He walked through the forest with Hokushin at his side. The demon had been close to his ancestral father when he was alive. Hopefully he could offer some advice.

"And you plan to make this human your mate?" The demon asked. He took a sharp turn in the forest and Yusuke followed.

"Yeah, and if you have any complaints, don't say 'em. I've heard it all." Having a short life would be worth it if he got to wake up everyday to that warm body.

There went his mind again.

"Very well. I will hold my tongue today." There was a pause before he spoke again. "Do you know that I was once the lover of someone like you and your father?"

That was news. "No way. I thought you Rokurokubi didn't fall in love," Yusuke replied

Hokushin smiled to himself. "We don't, but she was beautiful and someone who I considered a great friend. She was okay with what I had to offer."

"Huh." How strange. Yusuke couldn't imagine loving someone who couldn't love him back, but to each their own. His few years in Demon World had taught him that everyone had their own preference, and those could be anything.

"Anyway, I would suggest trying to keep your mind clean. That's really all the advice I can offer." Hokushin said.

"Great." Yusuke found that advice disappointing. He had been hoping for some advice that would be really effective, not something that he already knew.

They walked the rest of the way in silence. Suddenly, the trees ended, and they came across a flat, rocky surface with a large needle like piece of metal sticking up in the middle of it.

Yusuke turned and began to walk backwards towards it while still facing his escort. "Thanks for leading me out here."

The demon nodded. "Of course, your majesty. Farewell." With that, he took off.

Yusuke turned back to the needle and cracked his knuckles. It had been a long time since he had done this. As he was lifting his shirt over his head, he noticed several figures flying overhead. Two of the shapes locked arms and proceeded to spiral towards the ground together, only to break apart and pull up at the very last second. He noticed Jin among the demons high into the air. Yusuke smiled to himself. He was surprised it was mating season for his kind already, but he found the courtship dance to be beautiful. It was a display of trust and skill. He knew the demons didn't mind others watching, so he felt no shame for briefly observing the passionate acrobatics. Jin had even invited him to do so once.

Still, he was trying to get his mind off of love, so he turned his attention back to the spike. With a grunt, he jumped on top of it and began to balance himself by the tip of his pinky finger. A red ball of energy formed between them. Even for the powerful demon, this required all of his attention. If he got distracted, he could be returning home with one less finger. It was good task to silence his lust.

A mere half an hour later his markings and libido had faded, but he was too into his exercise to notice. It was only when a pair of demons came spiraling down form the sky right beside another hour later that he was pulled from his thoughts. He jumped away from his spike as a reflex. The pair shouted an apology before returning to the sky.

Well, he had done what he had come to do. He no longer felt the need to rub himself raw. After putting his shirt back on, he headed home.

* * *

It had been three days since he had hung out with Urameshi, and Kuwabara had managed to push the knowledge of the demon's crush to the back of his mind. It was surprisingly easy. There were other things to focus on like school and his friends. It was what he had been doing while Urameshi was in Demon World, after all.

He laid on his bed with a book in his lap. The radio quietly played music. As he was trying to memorize a few facts, the phone rang. He attempted to kick the phone on the bed to his hand. Failing, it rolled off the furniture, and he had to bend down to pick it up.

Urameshi's number flashed across the screen.

Kuwabara tossed the phone back to the floor and returned to laying on his bed. He didn't want to talk to the other right now. The fact that his friend had a crush on him sort of... disturbed him. It was gay, awkward. He was also hoping that if he ignored him for few days, the crush would pass like Kurama suggested it would. The answering machine picked up, and Kuwabara was able to hear Urameshi's voice from the living room.

"Hey Kuwabara, this is Yusuke. Just wondering when you'd like to hang out again. Sorry about leaving you before. Being a demon is, well... strange at times. I'll explain it to you later. Call me back when you can. See ya.''

The messenger ended there. So Urameshi wanted to confess to him. Kuwabara cringed at the thought. He didn't want to have to reject Urameshi or risk hurting their friendship. There was no way he was calling him back anytime soon.

One of his birds cooed softly. Raising himself on his elbow, Kuwabara watched as Lemon attempted to preen the other bird in the cage, but Nageki simply hopped to another branch.

"I thought you guys liked each other. Play nice, okay?"

Kuwabara picked his phone back up. His doves were reminding him of Urameshi, and he desperately wanted to get the man out of his mind. He dialed Yukina's number.


	5. The Kiss

Kuwabara sat on the sandy beach, leaning back on his hands and letting the water brush against his feet as the water came in and then out. Beside him sat Yukina, who was making a tall sandcastle with shells decorating it. Kuwabara spotted a pink shell and placed it on the castle's roof in a sort of flag. Yukina laughed.

"Thanks, Kuwabara," she said happily.

"Don't mention it."

The water continued to slowly flow in and out. Despite what he usually felt, Kuwabara was discontent sitting with Yukina, which he shouldn't be. He loved Yukina. She was everything a man could want in a woman. She was pretty, nice, modest, and she often talked about how she would love to be a mother one day. Being by her side should be the place he felt the most secure, yet it wasn't. It was strange.

Sure she hadn't returned any of his affection, but Yukina's first encounter with humans had been horrible. From what he had heard, her family had been misandrous too. If she needed time to come around to the idea of loving him, he could wait.

A hand was waved in front of his face. "Kazuma? Hello?"

"...Huh? Oh, sorry Yukina!" Kuwabara grinned in embarrassment and rubbed the back of his neck. "Guess I spaced out. My mind has been wondering a lot lately."

"I've noticed." Yukina replied in an affectionate and teasing tone. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothin' much. Just... thinking about things, I guess."

Thinking about Urameshi, when he allowed his mind to travel in that direction, which tried to prevent. He preferred to think about things that actually mattered like school, friends, and his family instead of some crush that he planned on letting pass.

"You seem conflicted. Do you want to talk about?" Yukina offered. "It could help."

Yeah, like he was going to talk about his best friend having a crush on him to the girl he loved.

Kuwabara shook his head. "Nah, I'll figure things out myself." He placed his hand over his heart. "My problem is one a man has to solve for himself."

"If you say so. Just remember I'm always here for you if you need it." Sensing a large wave about to come, Kuwabara used his spirit energy to put a wall between Yukina's castle and the sea. The demon smiled. "Thank you. That was kind of you."

"Don't mention it." Kuwabara let the wall fade. Yukina was the perfect woman. He would wait around for her however long he needed to.

* * *

It was a week later when Yusuke finally managed to speak with Kuwabara again. The seven days flew by. There wasa lot to keep him busy, mostly adjusting to his new job and coping with living by himself. He had managed to find a cheap apartment in the middle of town.

Video games also helped pass the time. He had a _lot_ of new games to catch up on.

Such a fact was what led him to entering a crowded arcade in the evening. The building was worn out and had cracks in the walls. The lights overhead kept flicking. It also reeked of cigarette smoke. Yusuke happened to like the smell and they kept up to date with their machines, so it was enough for him.

As he stepped into the arcade he was greeted with the familiar sight of flashing light and, surprisingly, of the unmistakable red pompadour of Kazuma Kuwabara. Yusuke's face lit up. His intention to play games forgotten, he ran over to the human. He was so engrossed in his simple fighting game that he didn't notice Yusuke until he had a pair of elbows resting on his shoulder. Yusuke had missed him more than he thought. It was a relief to see his dumb face again.

"So _this_ is where you've been hiding," Yusuke teased.

Kuwabara tilted his head up to see the demon, shock clear on his face. His hand tightened on the joy stick, and the screen lit up as Kuwabara's character was hit. He quickly turned his attention back to the game.

"Urameshi! You almost made me lose!" Kuwabara complained.

Yusuke laughed. "You suck at this game. You would have lost anyway."

Kuwabara shoved Yusuke off of him, causing the ex-Spirit Detective to blink in confusion. The rude gesture lacked any affection, something abnormal for the man.

Kuwabara didn't take his eyes off his game. "How did you know? You've never seen me play this game. Besides, I'd like to see you do any better," he said with a frown on his face.

"I bet I can! Whenever you lose, I'll take over."

The only response he got was a slight nod of the head. There was an awkward moment of silence. Then, since he had to eventually speak about what happened while they were at the hot springs and now was as good of time as ever, he spoke up.

"I should probably explain what happened to me before..." Yusuke found the words surprisingly hard to say. He had to pick just the right ones. He leaned up against the wall behind him and crossed his arms. "See, now that I'm a demon, my biology is a bit different, and since I've been back here, on Earth, my feelings have been-"

"Save it, Urameshi," Kuwabara interrupted. "Kurama explained things to me." Yusuke wasn't mad because for him, it was just explaining how his body worked, like translating something from another language into his own. "I'm not interested in any of your creepy gay stuff."

The constant sounds of the arcade suddenly seemed to go silent. Yusuke felt like his heart had been stomped on. Kuwabara didn't return his affection. He could have sworn the other had some not entirely friendly feelings for him, but no. His feelings were not returned.

Oh well. It hurt like hell, but it was something he could recover from. It wasn't the end of the world, and he was sure their friendship could survive the little incident. Saving the world together made a bond that was hard to break. Besides, it also saved him from having to worry about their difference of lifespans and-

Creepy. Kuwabara had called his gay feelings creepy. Yusuke's mood shifted dramatically. He stepped away from the wall and back to his original spot behind Kuwabara.

"What about me being gay being creepy?" Yusuke asked with indignation thick in his voice.

Kuwabara's character in the game died. With a huff, he stood up. "You heard me. It's... disgusting. Wrong." He frowned as he spoke, like it was wrong to even say those words. "I don't want any part in it."

Now Yusuke was pissed off. He grabbed Kuwabara's shirt.

He was briefly reminded just how much of a gap there was between the two of them. Kuwabara might be the strongest human alive, but he was still human. Yusuke had the power to break mountains with his fingertips. He could harm Kuwabara if he wasn't careful. He made sure to only grip his clothing and not any of his flesh.

"Oh really?! I'm disgusting, am I!? Tell me what's wrong with me liking guys."

"Urameshi! Let go of me!" Kuwabara attempted to push the demon away, but he stayed exactly where he was.

"Not until you answer my question," Yusuke demanded.

Kuwabara continued pushing on him. "I don't like you that way!"

"I didn't ask you that. I asked you what's so horrible about me being gay." Anger still filled his voice.

People were starting to look at the pair, but neither of the men paid any attention. Finally, Kuwabara stopped uselessly struggling.

"Because... Because it just is, okay? Men and men aren't suppose to be together. It's wrong," Kuwabara admitted at least.

It wasn't a good enough explanation for Yusuke to be satisfied, but it would have to do since it was all it seemed Kuwabara could offer. Yusuke released him.

"It's not wrong. I don't care if you like me or not, but me having feelings for another guy isn't wrong. If it is, I want you look me in the eye and tell me that even though I've saved the world multiple times and have risked my life for others, _gave_ my life for others, it makes me sick to love a man."

Kuwabara stared him. He opened his mouth to speak.

Yet, he couldn't say it.

He settled on an easier phrase. "Fuck off, Urameshi."

Yusuke showed him his middle finger. "And for your information, I'm pan, not gay."

With a nasty glare, Kuwabara left and retreated to an empty table in the back of the arcade. Yusuke set down at the machine and broke the joystick when he reached for it.

Damn it. He had been fine with Kuwabara not liking him. That he could understand. That he didn't take personally, but knowing that the other thought his love was disgusting, that hurt. He sighed and leaned against the brightly flashing screen.

He missed the simple days.

* * *

Urameshi's words stuck with him. As he sat at the table with his head in his hands, they wouldn't stop playing.

_It's not wrong. I don't care if you like me or not, but me having feelings for another guy isn't wrong._

But it had to be, didn't it? That was why homosexuals weren't allowed to marry and were treated so badly, because they were wrong. If it wasn't though, by some strange occurrence, did he have those types of feelings?

He could remember the first time he met Urameshi. It was a memory he tried not to think about because of how embarrassing it was. He had been smitten with the punk from the first time he saw him. To his child self, Urameshi was amazing. He could fight and had a cool attitude that he adored.

He remembered talking to one of his friends and saying that he wanted to marry him. His friend had laughed and pointed out that men couldn't marry men, which they still couldn't. At the time, Kuwabara had accepted those words and decided he would be his rival then.

Did he want to spend time with Urameshi? He forced himself to think about it despite the initial taboo of the subject. He did want to keep the man next to him for his entire life. He loved the fact that they had been through so much together and that he was the only human that Urameshi had saved the world with. He wanted to always be there for him, to hear all his laughs and be there to witness how his life unfolded. Sometimes, when their bodies brushed together during a fight or he saw him for the first time after a long absence, his heart would start to race in his chest. The knowledge that Urameshi actually had a crush on him was now making it really hard for him not to smile.

But what about Yukina and Botan? He had found them attractive too. Though, now that he thought about it, the fact that Botan didn't like him back and Yukina didn't seem able to understand romantic love never seemed to change his intention. If anything, it made him more confident he loved them. They were a way of reassuring himself he loved women without ever actually following through with a relationship.

He was in love with Urameshi. He was actually in love with the demon who he had just insulted for being gay. He felt like a fool.

Now that he admitted the idea to himself, he couldn't stop imagining loving Urameshi. He could go to bed with the fighter in his arms, kiss those sinfully pretty lips, hold his hand as they walked, and claim that beautifully scarred skin as his own.

Blushing heavily, Kuwabara left his table and approached Urameshi, who had moved to a working machine after having broke the previous one. He tapped the demon on his shoulder. Urameshi looked at him out of the corner of his eyes before returning his gaze to his game.

"What is it? If you're here to spout more homophobic nonsense, I don't want to hear it."

"It's not that," Kuwabara responded. "It's the opposite, actually." Now Urameshi turned around, his curiosity visible on his face. "I want to say I'm sorry, and I think I might... you know, like you." The words were hard to say, and Kuwabara could feel his face getting even redder.

"Oh really? What brought this on?" Urameshi put his hand on his hip. "You saying you like me is a big change from what I heard a few moments ago."

"I do," Kuwabara insisted. He didn't dare look away from Urameshi as he spoke. "But... I think, growing up, I heard the world shout that loving another man was wrong, and instead of fighting back, I accepted it and acted like I wasn't gay. I wanted to have someone I could marry."

"Kuwabara..." Urameshi's words were filled with sympathy.

The taller man continued. "If it possible though, for me to love you," hold him in his arms, kiss him, "I would like to."

Suddenly Urameshi's arms were around his neck and his lips were against his own. Kuwabara couldn't help but kiss back. It was absolute bliss. Warmth spread through his body, and when Urameshi pulled away, he found it to be all too soon.

"Of course it's possible, you idiot," Urameshi said.

Kuwabara joined their lips in a kiss once more.


	6. A Date

A/N: Sorry for late reply, but school started back.

* * *

Kuwabara found himself losing track of time. All that mattered mattered was that Urameshi was _kissing_ him, and it felt _good._ The enjoyment went beyond the simple pleasure lips touching lips brought. He adored that this was _Urameshi._ It was _Yusuke Urameshi_.

The smaller man had his arms wrapped around his neck. It was bliss. It was perfect. He could have stayed like he was forever if it wasn't for the fact they were in public. He pulled away and was greeted with Urameshi smiling happily at him like a love sick fool. He was also greeted with something more unsettling.

Urameshi's demon markings were showing again.

Like he had done once before, Kuwabara quickly took off his jacket and wrapped it around him. Urameshi gave him a confused look, but then he looked down at his shoulders.

"Shit." He stood and grabbed Kuwabara's hand. "Let's go. Your house or mine?" He left the arcade, and Kuwabara let himself by dragged out.

He was having a hard time processing what had just happened. Surprise, he was gay, and Yusuke Urameshi had just kissed him. Since his demon side was showing, that also meant Urameshi wanted to fuck him.

Kuwabara found himself blushing hard.

He silently followed Urameshi to his house. The ex-Spirit Detective kept looking straight ahead the entire time. He would squeeze Kuwabara's hand occasionally as they navigated through the city. Every time he did, Kuwabara would smile a bit more and squeeze his hand back.

Urameshi lived a few blocks from the arcade, so thankfully the journey did not last long. The demons was so eager to get inside he almost yanked the door off.

"Damn door... Don't know why I even lock it," Urameshi muttered to himself as he searched for his keys.

"Do you want me to help?" Kuwabara offered.

The shorter man shook his head. Finally he found his keys. After he unlocked the door, he yanked Kuwabara inside. Soon lips were brushing against lips again.

For a demon, Urameshi's touches felt surprisingly gentle. His actions were not filled with fiery lust but gentle compassion. Each touch, each subtle movement of the tongue, was focused on pleasing the human. Kuwabara found himself with his back against the wall and Urameshi getting rid of any space between them.

Hands traced his collarbone. Hearing Kuwabara moaned, Urameshi began to rub circles there and then kiss. The taller man tried his best to return the affection. He was hopelessly new at the act of loving. Finding out where to touch and where to kiss instead of sucking or running his nails over was a struggle, but Urameshi vocalized his responses so well he quickly learned. Buttons came undone. Urameshi gently tossed Kuwabara's jacket on him to the side than the human's shirt found its way to the floor as well.

Though he looked different than normal, Kuwabara couldn't help but find Urameshi beautiful. The passion in his eyes sent shivers down his spine. His fangs felt alien under his tongue.

Urameshi's top was thrown away, and he began to grind against the man beneath him. Kuwabara felt all his blood run south and rational thought start to leave him. Yet, he tensed. The other created a bit of space between them then returned to gently kissing him.

Kisses and touches and bites made his blood race, but the idea of touching below the waist was unnerving.

"Urameshi," Kuwabara spoke between kisses and moans. "I'm not ready to go that far yet."

Urameshi pulled back and looked up at Kuwabara. On top of his demon markings fading, he looked like a puppy someone kicked.

Kuwabara was reminded of the way Lemon looked when Nageki was ignoring him.

"But I thought... You said... You said you liked me!" Urameshi's shouted both with hurt and disbelief.

"Just because I like you doesn't mean I have to sleep with you." Kuwabara explained without breaking eye contact with his almost lover. His tones was a bit defensive.

Urameshi should have known that. Kuwabara was slightly surprised he was making such a big deal out of his comment.

The demon stared at him for a moment, then laughed at himself.

"Of course! My bad. I... It's a demon thing." The pain that had previously filled Urameshi's voice gradually faded as he talked. He rubbed the back of his head. "The 'courting' is a bit different for my kind. Things end at a confession and..." he sighed and kicked off his shoes. "That's no excuse." He sat down on his couch and proceeded to stretch, groaning while doing so.

That was right. Urameshi was a demon now. Kuwabara could easily accept things like his markings appearing or him talking about his unusual way of loving, but it was when he saw him act different that he was truly reminded of that fact. Kuwabara took off his own shoes before sitting down next to him. He wrapped his arm around Urameshi's shoulder.

"It's fine. I'd just like my first time to be special." He felt silly talking about this.

Urameshi chuckled. "I understand, you doofus. I want the same thing. Besides, bonding with someone like me is a big decision."

"Damn. I completely forget about that." He sighed in relief that he had avoided that predicament. That had been close. If he had slept with Urameshi, and then things didn't work out or he died in an accident, he would have killed the other fighter.

Urameshi leaned his weight after the larger man. Kuwabara instinctively pulled him a bit closer, and his actions got the other fighter to relax. "My bad. I should've mentioned it again. I forget how different things are here than in the demon world," he softly confessed. "There's over a hundred different sexuality and genders back there, and yet everyone understands how things work. When you confess to someone like me, you _know_ what you're getting yourself into."

Kuwabara snorted. "Quit your whining. I don't care about how things are in the Demon World. This is your home, Urameshi, on Earth."

The sound of laughter filled the air. "Ah, there's the Kuwabara I adore!" He placed a kiss on the man's cheek, which made Kuwabara's eyes widened in surprise. "Don't worry. I won't ever forget my ties to Earth. I was born and raised here."

"Exactly! You belong here."

"Yeah yeah, I get it.

Before Kuwabara could respond, Urameshi let his head rest on Kuwabara's chest and inhaled deeply. "You smell like smoke, even without your clothes on. I can smell your birds too."

"Do I? Sorry about that." Kuwabara scratched the side of his own face. "Shizuru's really started smoking me, and the smell gets everywhere."

Urameshi shook his head. "Don't apologize. I like the way you smell. It reminds me of home."

That statement made Kuwabara more happy then he thought it would. He could only manage a nod in reply.

* * *

Yusuke rolled over in bed. There was someone outside his door.

He could feel their energy. If he cared enough he could easily focus on the energy and determine who it belonged too, but it was just barely noon. It was far too early for that kind of minimal effort. With a groan, he rolled over and pulled his sheets over his head.

The figure outside knocked on the door. Yusuke groaned again. He had spent the last three years working in Demon World and saving all of reality. He deserved to be able to sleep as long as he wanted. Sure, he could actually go weeks without sleep, but needing sleep never impacted how much he wanted sleep.

They knocked once more. Son of a bitch. If the person wasn't important, he could ignore them and go back to bed. So, he took a deep breath, reached out to sense the visitor's energy and...

It was Kazuma Kuwabara. He was worth getting up for.

Yusuke jumped out of bed. He quickly switched out of his pajamas and into a white tank top and the first pair of fresh smelling pants on the floor. Kuwabara knocked again.

"Coming!" Yusuke shouted.

He took one quick look at himself in the mirror. His hair was standing up at odd intervals, but he looked presentable enough. Moments later, he opened the door to reveal a familiar red headed man who smiled widely upon seeing him.

"Urameshi!" Soon warm arms were wrapped around the demon. It had been two days since the confession at the arcade, and it was good to see the other again.

"What are you doing here, you idiot?"

He kissed Kuwabara on the cheek, causing him to blush deeply. The man still wasn't used to Yusuke kissing him. God, he found that man adorable. Kuwabara broke the gesture and coughed, most likely in an attempt to hide his embarrassment.

"Man, I didn't know you could turn that red, Kuwabara." Yusuke interlocked his fingers behind his head.

"I'm not blushing! Real man don't get embarrassed by affection," Kuwabara protested.

Yusuke shook his head. "Yeah. Sure. Whatever makes you feel the best."

"Anyway, I thought I'd come and see you. If you're free this afternoon, we could go on a date."

"Today? Let's see..." He glanced upwards as he thought. "Can't, sorry." Kuwabara looked devastated by that information, so Yusuke was quick to finish with his explanation. "I told Keiko I would spend today with her, and I need to run into town to get her some flowers beforehand."

Kuwabara looked concerned. "Why? Is everything alright?"

He nodded. "Yep, just feel like doing something sweet for her. She's a real good friend, and I'd like to do a little somethin' in return."

"So you're giving her flowers? Don't you think that's a little girly?"

Yusuke raised an eyebrow. "Keiko mentioned that she's been wanting some flowers, so I'm going to give her some flowers."

Kuwabara shrugged. "Suit yourself. I could tag along, if you want."

The demon could have ran to the flower shop in under a minute, but spending time with Kuwabara was well worth the sacrifice. He nodded and took the man's hand into his own. A tug of the arm arm later, they were heading towards the flower shop.

"So, Urameshi, there's something I want to ask you," Kuwabara said as they walked down the sidwalk.

"Oh? Go ahead."

Yusuke was purposefully taking the long way to the store. Cars drove by them as they turned a corner.

"About your..." Kuwabara paused as he struggled to find the right word, "your dying when your lover dies... Are you sure that will happen? I mean, you said Raizen was like you, right? And he only died recently? Surely your mother, er, ancestral mother, died long ago."

The question was serious enough to wipe away the carefree smile on Yusuke's face. He ran his free hand through his hair.

"Sexuality is what its usually referred to, and yeah, I'm sure." Before he had doubted it, but now that he was getting closer to Kuwabara, he could _feel_ his demon inheritance. Loving Kuwabara was different than loving Keiko. He had loved Keiko through emotions and actions. She made him happy when they were together. He wanted to be around her. With Kuwabara though, he wanted to completely give himself over to the other, and he could tell when he finally did, the love would be so much it would be a need that he would die from when it was pulled away.

It wasn't a stronger love but just a different kind. "We die of heartbreak, not just our lover dying. My old man believed he would get to see his mate again, so that hope kept him alive. When he finally gave up... his heart did too."

Kuwabara let go of his hand and stuffed it into his pocket. "That sucks. I almost feel bad for the guy."

"I do." His hand felt cold without Kuwabara's warmth. "I can only imagine what it must have felt like suffering through those decades feeling like half your soul was missing."

Was that what awaited him? When he looked at Kuwabara, he knew the man was only a man, and loving him would be ending his life very early.

Oh well. Yusuke wasn't going to run away from happiness just because of what it might cause. Besides, as he glanced down at the perfectly formed rear that belonged to Kuwabara, he knew tapping that would be worth it. Plus he just adored the other man and being near him made his body feel bliss.

"There was one more thing too," Kuwabara said. "I've always wanted to have a family, ever since I was a kid, can we have children?"

The words were heavy. Yusuke whistled. "With a bit of assistance, yeah; we could have little shits of our own." Yusuke laughed. That was a funny image. Him and Kuwabra with kids of their own! Still, it was a good possible future. He wanted offspring of his own. "Kurama has a plant that does this thingey where it creates an artificial womb or something in a person, and there are also these fish that can change a person's sex."

"They... What? How does that work!?" Kuwabara almost shrieked.

"Ask Kurama." Seeing Kuwabara's disturbed face, Yusuke waved his hand as if to dismiss the topic. "But that's way ahead of us, so there's plenty of time to figure that all out."

He spotted the flower shop from across the street, and after grabbing Kuwabara's wrist, he darted across the empty intersection. The school student followed right beside him. The flower stand was a small little store. Not only were the flowers of all colors hanging from shelves in plastic bags, there were also potted pants laying around the stand. Yusuke crouched down to get closer to a red rose.

"Which one of the flowers do you think I should get?" He gently flicked the rose.

Kuwabara glanced over at the still alive flower. "Not that one. I've got a bad feeling about them. Let's see..." He scanned the merchandise, and then he pointed to plastic bag filled with yet more flowers. "Those seem good."

"Thanks." Yusuke fished a few coins out of his pocket and handed them to the owner. Afterward, he turned to Kuwabara and kissed him on the lips. "I've got to go now. See ya later?"

"You know it! I'll call you later tonight, Urameshi."

With that, the demon left.

* * *

Loving Kuwabara was hard.

When they kissed, when Kuwabara claimed his mouth as his own and their bodies moved together, Yusuke knew that the kisses would be all that happened. He couldn't yet give himself completely over to the man. He adored the time he spent with Kuwabara, but currently, he felt like he was only loving him half of what he should. It wasn't the sex he craved, but the bond that it carried with it.

Even now, after days since the confession had turned to weeks and months, Yusuke knew that this was yet another night that would end with them still far apart. Kuwabara had him against the red head's own bed. Their limbs were wrapped around each other's body in a way that made Yusuke just want more.

Asking couldn't hurt, could it?

"Kuwabara... Do you..." He gasped in pleasure as the other man's hands stroked a sensitive part of his back. "Think we could... you know."

The addressed man pulled back into a sitting position. One leg was on each side of his almost lover. "I'm sorry, Urameshi. I'm just not ready yet."

Yusuke nodded. If he didn't he'd feel like a horrible partner. "I understand. It's fine."

He pulled down on the man's shoulders to bring his lips back within reach. He could be patient. Most Mazoku, like his dad, made love to their mates within weeks, but they hadn't been born humans. He could love without full love. Yeah, the love he felt now, the joy he felt when he saw Kuwabara at the start of each day, that was enough for the man. Until the day he could give himself to Kuwabara, he would be happy with what he had.

Kuwabara never asked why his markings had stopped appeared. Yusuke had learned months ago to not hope too strongly.


	7. Now or Never

Morning had become pleasant for Kuwabara.

Most mornings he would wake up with Urameshi in his arms. The shorter man was usually still asleep, and Kuwabara's shifting would wake him no matter how subtle he tried to be. Some mornings he would pull Urameshi against his chest and kiss him until his eyes fluttered open. He was a romantic at heart. He took advantage of the times when Urameshi would let him get away with being a doting partner.

They had become close. Few days went by when he didn't at least talk to the demon, and yet, he still called him Urameshi. It was funny how somethings never changed.

His mornings were often peaceful, but today was no such morning.

Kuwabara's eyes shot open. He attempted to quickly leave the bed, but he was stopped by a powerful hand grabbing on to his wrist. He tugged on Urameshi, and the demon let him go.

"Everything alright, Kuwabara?" Despite only waking up mere seconds again, Urameshi sounded awake and alert.

"Nothing too bad," Kuwabara quickly replied back. He laid down on the floor and began to look under Urameshi's bed "Just going to — Do you remember where I put my shirt? —going to eat some breakfast with my sister. She made me promise I'd met her in twenty minutes."

He heard Urameshi rolling over on the bed above. Kuwabara reached for a white lump he thought was his t-shirt only to find an old tissue only the bed. He crinkled his nose. Yuck. Urameshi needed to clean up. He stood up and did a quick visual search of the room.

"There's one in the nightstand drawer from when you were here last time."

Kuwabara checked the drawer Urameshi had mentioned. True to his word, one of his shirts was in it along with the many other things Kuwabara had left behind on accident. It wasn't what he wanted, but it would do.

He caught Urameshi smiling at him as he slipped off his nightshirt to put on the other piece of clothing. He was lying on his arm with his face towards him. The demon whistled, and Kuwabara chuckled.

"Like what you see?" he teased as he began his search for his pants.

"Mh-hm," Urameshi replied back. "I've seen better, but you're not too bad."

Kuwabara's smile grew, and he watched Urameshi's do the same. "Oh please. Sure I'm not as built as some of your demon friends, but you'll find no other man with a heart like mine." Though he was not even close to being out of shape, Kuwabara's wasn't as muscular as he once was. His more relaxed lifestyle didn't require it.

Urameshi laughed happily before propping himself up on his elbow. "Never change, Kuwabara. You're perfect just the way you are." He watched Kuwabara search for his pants a bit before speaking again, this time with a softer tone. "You know, you could always move in. You spend about half the week here with me already."

Kuwabara's heart raced. "You mean it? Seriously?"

"Of course." Urameshi fell back onto the bed and tucked his hands behind his head. "You'll have an easier time finding your stuff and can help me pay for the rent. Everyone wins."

The human nodded. "I'd love to! I'll tell my sister at breakfast the good news! I'm sure my birds will be overjoyed too. They've been missing me lately." He stopped his searching for the last part of his outfit to grab the phone on the nightstand. "On second thought, I don't really want to eat with my sister anyway. She'll probably just nag me the entire time. Let's do something instead! We can get some doughnuts in celebration."

He could eat with Shizuru anytime. Today was special. Today was when he would be taking the next step in his relationship with Urameshi.

"Sounds good to me!" With a grunt, Urameshi got out of bed. "Won't your sister be mad though? Nothing's scarier than a pissed off woman."

Kuwabara shrugged. "You act like my sister's some kind of demon. Besides..." Since Urameshi had asked him to live with him, now seemed like the perfect time to say those three words he had been dying to get off his chest. He blushed heavily. "I love you, Urameshi. She'll understand. It's not like I don't spend plenty of time with her."

The air grew heavy. As Kuwabara counted the seconds ticking by and Urameshi's mouth remained closed, Kuwabara felt his stomach drop. Shit. Fuck. Urameshi didn't say he loved him back. Instead, the demon had grown quiet and distracted himself with picking out clothes to wear.

The redhead rubbed the back of his next. Did Urameshi not feel what he felt? Surely he did. It hurt to think otherwise. The silence stretched on. Kuwabara decided to break it. "I... Never mind. Forget I said anything."

"No, Kuwabara," Urameshi's words were filled with care. "It's not that I don't care for you back, but..." He let out a frustrated sigh and dug his hand into his hair. "I want to say I love you too, but I _can't_ until I show you that."

Sex. When he was teenager, Kuwabara never imagined he would be as afraid of it as he was right now. He danced around the topic any time Urameshi brought it up, which even though he didn't bring it up as much as he once did, it was still a reoccurring request. It wasn't the act itself Kuwabara was wary of. It was the complications.

Urameshi turned to face him, and Kuwabara had a hard time looking at him in the eyes. He looked heartbroken, like he was struggling with some heavy emotion.

"I want to give myself to you, Kuwabara. Damn it, I feel so damn stupid talking like this! Asking for sex like a teenage girl." He let out another sigh. "Are we ever going to become lovers?"

The topic was a touchy one, and Kuwabara had to be careful with his words to avoid causing more harm to his partner. "If I get to pick, no. I love you from the bottom of my heart, but what if I got sick within the next year and died? Even if I live a long time, you could still have thousands of years after me. I don't want to cause you to die, Urameshi."

"Because that's love for me!" Now Urameshi was blushing heavily. "This is all so fucking embarrassing. I know I must sound so, so stupid to you. Let me put it this way: this, this flirting without anything else, it's like it's not even dating. There's none of this in-between stuff for me. For me, a relationship means giving myself completely to someone, and not doing so is driving me mad. I'm not completely human anymore. I don't _love_ like you do." He placed his hand on his hip. "And it's my life! It's my choice if I want to waste my thousands of years on you, which I do! Besides, who said I wanted to outlive everyone? " He was beginning to calm down. "That sounds like a bitch."

"Urameshi..." This was the first time the other had so passionately explained his feelings. "I understand how you feel, but I don't want your life to end with mine. You won't be satisfied unless it's that way though, will you?"

Urameshi shook his head. "No. I don't think I will be. I need something deeper than this or nothing at all."

So saying no would end his relationship with Urameshi. Dread bubbled up in his stomach. He adored the brawler with every ounce of his being. It was either spending a happy human lifetime with him, or allowing Urameshi to get to live for centuries. Why couldn't Urameshi just be more normal and not have any of this dumb demon sexuality? Then he could happily propose to him without a second thought.

"Alright. Alright. I won't delay any longer. Give me some time to think, and I'll give you your answer within a month."

Urameshi nodded. Instantly, he seemed to relax. He stepped closer to Kuwabara and pulled him into a hug. "Thank you. I'm sorry for this, but I can't help it."

Kuwabara wrapped his arms around him. "Don't worry about it. I know you, Urameshi." He knew that even though he may appear tough, Urameshi didn't try to harm people. He knew the little things that made him who he was, like how he couldn't stand when his pillow got too warm and that cigarettes reminded him of home. "You would change it if you could."

"Yeah, that'd make things easier." He leaned his head against the taller man's chest. "Kuwabara, I'm going to visit Demon World in a few days. I promised Chu I'd help him with something, and Suzuka and Shishiwakamaru are having kids soon. I want you to come with me, to see what my other home world is like."

"To Demon World?! What business do I have there? I'm not like you, Urameshi, I'm not a demon, and your home is here on Earth."

The shorter man frowned at him. "You act like it's some evil place. It's not, I promise. 'Sides, everyone's been asking about you. They'd love to see you again."

"How are long are you staying?"

"Just a few days, long enough to check in on all my friends."

"...Alright. I'll come with you. You know, I can't picture those guys as fathers."

Urameshi chuckled. "That doesn't surprise me."


End file.
